I recently saw the debut of Microsoft’s new $300 millions ad campaign to counter those “I’m a Mac ads”, and I have to say, I’m confused. I’d always thought that Bill would make a great pitchman, like what Dave Thomas did for Wendy’s. Although, Bill had a reputation, over the years, of being a tyrant, his public image seems to be that of a lovable nerd.
So, here’s ad # 1
After watching it, I thought it felt disjointed. Perhaps it’ll make more sense as part of a series. Although, that’s never something you’d want to say for a debut to anything. But what I noticed was Bills quick, short lines. I fired up Excel and plopped in the transcript.
Bill had 1.9 words per line. That’s autism territory.
Come on ad people, let Bill talk.
| Spkr | Line | Count | | JS | BG |
| JS | Shoe Circus, quality shoes at discount prices. Why pay more? Bill Gates? | 12 | # of lines | 16 | 10 |
| BG | Jerry Seinfeld? | 2 | # of words | 155 | 19 |
| JS | Churro? | 1 | # words / line | 9.7 | 1.9 |
| BG | I'm good. | 2 | | | |
| BG | The left one's a little tight | 6 | | | |
| XSG | They'll stretch | 2 | | | |
| JS | You sure they’ll stretch? | 4 | | | |
| JS | Is that your toe? | 4 | | | |
| BG | No | 1 | | | |
| JS | What is it? | 3 | | | |
| BG | Leather. | 1 | | | |
| JS | These are Conquistadors, they run very tight. You get the other one. You know what I do? I wear them in the shower. Ever wear clothes in the shower, Bill? | 30 | | | |
| BG | Never | 1 | | | |
| JS | You're dressed, and you're clean. Open the door, go about your business. | 12 | | | |
| JS | He's a 10 | 3 | | | |
| XSG | 10 | 1 | | | |
| JS | See how that feels | 4 | | | |
| BG | Better | 1 | | | |
| JS | That's a 10 | 3 | | | |
| XW | Is the The Conquistador? | 4 | | | |
| JS | Guess what, Bill. You're a 10. | 6 | | | |
| XM | They run very tight | 4 | | | |
| XSG | Are you a Shoe Circus Clown Club member? | 8 | | | |
| BG | Platinum | 1 | | | |
| JS | What do you get with that card? | 7 | | | |
| BG | Big-top points | 2 | | | |
| JS | Aahh | 1 | | | |
| JS | You know, I imagine, over the years, you mind-meld your magnum Jupiter brain with those other Saturn-ring brains of Microsoft. | 22 | | | |
| BG | I have. | 2 | | | |
| JS | Just wondering, are they ever going to come out with something that'll make our computers moist and chewy like cakes so that we can eat them while we're working? If it's yes, give me a signal. Adjust your shorts. | 39 | | | |
| JS | Oh, I knew it. | 4 | | | |